


The Way of the Soul

by kenaran



Category: Battlestar Galactica (2003)
Genre: Drama, Episode: s04e08 Sine Qua Non, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-06
Updated: 2015-10-06
Packaged: 2018-04-25 04:46:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4947280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kenaran/pseuds/kenaran
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Laura's back from the basestar some time after 4x08, she and Lee have a little talk.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Way of the Soul

**Author's Note:**

> First published: June 2008 (Survival Instinct)
> 
> Spoilers for everything up to 4x08 Sine Qua Non.
> 
> I’m assuming Laura will get back, somehow. And that she and Lee will agree to make her President again, somehow. I prefer watching the show rather than making my own guesses regarding these somehows, so everyone just assume they’ve been dealt with. Somehow ;)
> 
> Disclaimer: I don’t own any of them. Which is a pity, really. Not so much for the money, but because then I’d already know what’s going to happen. All this waiting is driving me insane...

"I'm really glad we worked things out." Laura rose, expecting the meeting to end and Lee Adama to leave. This had gone better than she had believed possible.

"So am I, Madam President." Nevertheless he showed no intention of leaving. Instead he added, his voice less formal than before: "Could I talk to you in a personal matter?"

They both knew he was asking a lot. After the trial she had mostly been avoiding him, not talking any more than work and etiquette demanded. Things were complicated.

He could have just told her what he wanted to talk about, knowing without a doubt that would leave her no choice but to listen, but it would not help him understand where exactly he was standing at the moment. So he didn't.

Her mind, her every rational thought, told her to stay away from him, to not trust him, to not ever let him see anything but business again. Her heart was far less chatty but no less insistent: _'He's his son!'_

Raising an eyebrow, she sat down again, but didn't say anything. Her questioning gaze, intended to make him cut right to the point, did just that: "It's about my father."

As he had known, that made sure her attention was on him, and only him.

"When he went after you in that Raptor –" 

Roslin rose a hand, interrupting him: "Lee, I wasn't too thrilled about that either..." Weren't you? Her inner voice wouldn't let her get away with that. "Well, I was, but... I trust you know what I mean."

"Of course I do." He could hardly blame her. Who wouldn't appreciate being shown a love like that? "But that's not really what I was talking about." 

"But?"

"Before he took off I asked him why. He told me 'because I can't live without her.' " He heard her sigh, but didn't let himself get distracted by it. This was hard enough as it was, getting sidetracked would not make it any easier. "I really hate to bring it up, but I don't think he's dealing with... well, with..." As determined as he was, he still couldn’t bring himself to say it.

And he didn't have to, she knew anyway: "... the fact that I'm dying. At all. I know."

"It's going to crush him."

She couldn't help flinching at that. Good ol' Lee. Trust him to voice the thoughts nobody wanted to hear. However, he certainly wouldn't be thrilled to hear her reply either: "I really don't know what to do about it. The last time the topic came up we ended up really hurting each other. I believe you'll understand I'm not too keen on repeating that. But I would, in an instant, if I had any hope of actually accomplishing something by it."

There was no need to explain any further. Lee understood: "He doesn't want to talk, he just closes down."

"Or lashes out." They both had experienced that side of Bill Adama. Still, this felt entirely too much like some secret tribunal for her comfort, especially remembering that earlier conversation she had just mentioned, so she added: "Not to say that I don't.", but Lee didn't even seem to hear her.

They both looked at each other for a moment, sharing their misery. He was the one to finally break the silence by summing up their feelings: "Frak!"

He certainly was right on that one. In her frustration Laura could barely keep from trashing something. Anything. Instead she managed to continue: "I'm sorry, Lee, but I really don't see anything I can do right now and, believe me, I've been thinking about it a lot."

He nodded. With an impish smile, he added: "Well, sorry to say, but you just can't die then."

Despite herself she had to grin, too. Bless him for ligthening the mood like that. She sobered fast enough though: "I am trying. Not for this..." she said, waving her right hand in a gesture indicating her office, the fleet and by extension their whole search for Earth, "but for us. If it wasn't for him, I'd have given up hope long ago."

His response was automatic: "Never give up hope!"

Again, she smiled. Like father, like son. Still, now that they were talking she couldn't stop halfway through: "If that's not enough and I really... I can only hope that I'll find something to say to him when the time comes... maybe I can make him promise to... go on. And if that fails...", she looked at Lee, somehow managing to appear both pleading and commanding at the same time, "I need you to promise me to do everything you can to help him."

There was only one possible answer to that: "Of course."

That answer, however, wasn't enough for her, so she went on: "Don't let yourself be pushed away. He doesn't want to talk, he just closes down..."

"Or lashes out." They both rolled their eyes, feeling very much like co-conspirators. "No pushing away. I promise."

"Thank you. That means a lot to me." It really did. Despite his shortcomings and despite their history – the one thing she would never question about Lee Adama was his honesty. She knew he would keep that promise, no matter the cost, as long as there was any way he could. Feeling bad for not being able to offer him anything in return, she added: "I really wish there was more that I could do."

He just nodded, but his eyes let her know he understood.

She rose, "I'm sorry, but I have this Quorum meeting scheduled and I need to go through these", she pointedly looked at all the papers scattered over her desk, "before that. The delegates have a tendency to ask the most annoying questions, so I'd better be prepared."

Exchanging amused smiles, they both knew they had found a new understanding they'd be able to rely on, no matter what happened in the political arena. After a respectful nod, he started leaving and she sat down again, taking in her desk and the work piled upon it with a sigh.

"Laura?" Startled, she looked up again, to see him still standing at the curtain that was supposed to be her door. "Don't let this keep you from enjoying what you have!"

She could feel her eyes watering up. After everything they had just talked about, why would that one sentence affect her like that? The answer, of course, was simple enough: _'He's his son!'_

Whether or not he had noticed her reaction, he couldn't resist teasing her: "Took you long enough!" he jabbed, before rushing out just in time to avoid the pencil that had been thrown at him.

**Author's Note:**

> Since it has been pointed out to me that explaining your titles can indeed be a good thing, here it goes: "The Way of the Soul" is the original title of a poem better known as "In Memoriam A.H.H." by Tennyson. The most quoted lines of that poem are:
>
>> I hold it true, whate'er befall;  
> I feel it when I sorrow most;  
> 'Tis better to have loved and lost  
> Than never to have loved at all.  
> 
> 
> No idea why A/R would make me think of that ;)


End file.
